We’ve been skeptical of the live-action to life Dora The Explorer film as far back as we heard that it would be produced by Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes label, and our hesitance to accept this is a genuine article has essentially gotten stronger and stronger with the announcement that Benicio Del Toro would play the villainous Swiper and the recent revelation that Danny Trejo will be playing the monkey Boots.

Fortunately, presently that the main first trailer for Dora And The Lost City Of Gold has been released, we can serenely say that there is literally nothing stunning or astonishing about any of this.

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It’s as much of a paint-by-numbers adaptation of a kids show as possible, with Dora being a peppy, naive, fish-out-of-water character in a world of snarky, real-life teens who are too cool for exploring.

There’s even a “high school is the real scary jungle adventure!” moment and a Terminator reference that is there so grown-ups can have a good time too.

Basically, anyone who saw the impressive cast and thought this might be a surprisingly cool movie… really should’ve known better. Also, there’s no sign of Platinum Dunes in this trailer, so maybe Michael Bay’s involvement has been overstated. Either way, College Humor’s Dora still looks like a better movie.

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